


Nothing

by Hopeloveandpride



Series: Ereri tattoo artist oneshots [2]
Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Tattoos, Angst, Caring Levi (Shingeki no Kyojin), Eren Has Anger Issues, Eren has a breakdown, Eren has a lot of issues, Established Relationship, Levi tries his best to make Eren feel better ok, M/M, To Be Continued, he's my sad son, if i feel like it, if you squint at least, poor eren
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-17
Updated: 2018-07-17
Packaged: 2019-06-11 20:34:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,165
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15323766
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hopeloveandpride/pseuds/Hopeloveandpride
Summary: Eren finds himself in a creative slump, which quickly turns into a depressive episode. Levi is there for him, even if there's little he can do.





	Nothing

**Author's Note:**

> So like I lowkey wanted to write another oneshot based on the Eren and Levi I wrote once before, and it turned into angst really fast lmao sorry. I left the ending pretty open ended so just let me know if you want more or something.

Eren sighed and looked at the sketch with contempt. It wasn’t a bad drawing, at least that’s what Levi told him, but it just didn’t feel right. Something felt off about his sketches lately, and he wasn’t sure why. Maybe he needed to change his environment, or take a walk, or do something, but he just didn’t want to bother. He tore the page out, crumpled it, and threw it in the pile with the rest of the rejects. The frustration caused by his creative block was almost too much to handle, so he turned on the TV and tried to calm himself down. Levi usually knew how to calm him down when he got like this, but he was out with Hanji and Erwin. They hadn’t had a night out together in a long time, and the last thing Eren wanted to do is take away from that. Besides that, he knew Eren was in a slump with his tattoos and would be more than willing to help once he got home. He checked his phone anyway, just to see if Levi had messaged him at all.

He didn’t find anything besides the usual Twitter and Instagram notifications, so he tossed his phone to the side and focused on whatever was on the T.V. It looked to be some sort of reality show, and he didn’t feel like getting up to retrieve the remote. He watched it for a while and eventually fell asleep with the TV still turned on. Pretty standard nightly routine when Levi is gone as of late.

He woke up in his bed, a blanket over him and Levi by his side. He smiled to himself and felt the body next to him stir. Levi turned around and opened his grey eyes to meet Eren’s. Eren went for a kiss, but Levi stopped him.

“Your breath smells like shit,” he said bluntly.

“Good morning to you too babe,” responded Eren.

“Go brush your teeth if you want to kiss me you little shit,”

Eren obliged and left Levi’s embrace for the bathroom. That was his boyfriend alright — blunt as ever. He brushed his teeth as usual and crawled back into bed.\

“Can I kiss you now? Pleaseeee,” Eren begged.

“I guess so, if you keep begging like that,” Levi teased.

Eren felt himself starting to blush and hid it by finally giving Levi a soft kiss.

“How was your night?” Eren was avoiding the inevitable conversation about why he was asleep on the couch. Levi knew when he was getting bad, and that was one of the signs he was trying to hide. It was bad enough he was in yet another slump, even with the new medication he was put on.

“It was alright I guess, Hanji was as annoying as usual,” Levi shifted to sit next to Eren and looked in his eyes. “Are you ok?”

Eren avoided all eye contact and told a white lie. He was fine, he just had a creative block. He reassured Levi, but he saw right through it. Even if he didn’t say anything, it was unsaid that he knew what that meant. It meant late nights talking Eren through his every frustration and watching as he struggled to come up with any new tattoo designs. It meant holding Eren as he forced to keep himself together, even when he didn’t need to be strong for Levi. It meant therapy appointments, long drives, and piles and piles of dirty laundry. Levi didn’t need to say anything because it happened sometimes. Eren had periods of depressive episodes and there was nothing much to do except stay by his side and make sure he still takes care of himself. He has been known to stop eating, forget to shower, or stay in bed for days on end.

“Ok Eren, I’m here for you if you need it,” said Levi Eren smiled, lied back down, and told Levi he needed some more sleep.

**

When he woke up, there was a pastry on his nightstand and Levi was nowhere to be seen. He headed to the table where he left his sketchbook and sat down to enjoy his breakfast. After he was satisfied, he checked his phone.

**From: Levi**

_Sorry for leaving, I had to go to work. Told Annie you were sick, she gave you the day off._

**To: Levi**

_Thank you._

Levi didn’t need to say it, but Eren knew that meant I love you. He didn’t say it often, but his actions made up for it. Eren smiled as he grabbed the sketchbook and started another attempt at a drawing. This time he didn’t have something specific in mind, and he drew without a care in the world. It turned out badly, again, and this time Eren was no longer able to keep his frustration in check. He ripped the page out of his notebook and tore it into tiny pieces. He took his chair and chucked it across the room in his rage. When he realized what he had done it was too late, and the picture of his mother lay broken on the ground. It was the last picture he had of her before she died, and the only one he had framed.

He slumped to the ground, and without a care in the world started to cry. Levi came home to this, and could do nothing but watch his boyfriend fall apart. Sure, he broke down sometimes, but never like this. When Eren broke down, it was full of rage. He was angry at the world then, and the only thing that stopped the hurt was to break things. The fights he got into left scars and bruises all over his face, but Levi was always there to patch him up. This time, the scars weren’t physical. This time the tender hand of Levi would do nothing to help. He felt powerless, but he still wrapped his arms around Eren. He still rocked and hushed Eren with the hope that it would help.

Eren calmed at the sensation, but the hurt and pain still lingered. It was his fault she died, and it was his fault he destroyed his last memory of her. It was always his fault. There was nothing he could do now but cry and hope the pain would stop. The pain never seemed to stop sometimes, and he felt so lost. He didn’t know what to do, even with the embrace of his lover keeping him somewhat sane. It wasn’t enough. Nothing would be enough. Nothing would stop the hurt. Nothing.

**

Eventually, it was time to pick up the broken pieces. Eren had worn himself out crying, and he was asleep in his bed. Levi took this time to sweep up the broken pieces of the picture frame, put the chair back, and throw away the ripped paper that covered the table. The storm would pass, it always did, but this one was the worst.


End file.
